The roast returns: Nikki Glaser gears up for Golden Globes bloodbath
The elite of Hollywood are officially on notice. Nikki Glaser is returning to the Beverly Hilton on January , , for her second consecutive year as host of the Golden Globe Awards, and the insider whispers suggest she is not pulling any punches. After her debut saw her ruthlessly take down Ben Affleck and Selena Gomez, producers reportedly handed her a blank check to do it all over again. But this time, the behind-the-scenes chaos regarding her monologue has reached a fever pitch.
Glaser admitted via the official Globes website that the writing process has been “tough,” as she tries to balance being funny without being “too mean.” However, her definition of “mean” might differ from the A-listers in the front row. With heavyweights like Leonardo DiCaprio and Timothee Chalamet in the line of fire, the suspicious behavior of certain stars’ publicists has already begun. We are hearing that several camps have reached out to “check the temperature” of her jokes, but Glaser is notoriously unfiltered.
The comedian is leaving nothing to chance, revealing she practiced her previous monologue a staggering times before hitting the stage. This year, the grueling rehearsal process is even more intense. Glaser told E! News that she stays “off-book” so she can pivot to unplanned roasts if a celebrity makes a weird face in the crowd. It is a calculated pursuit of the perfect burn, and the industry is shaking in its designer heels.
As kicks off, Glaser is no longer the underdog; she is the judge, jury, and executioner of the awards season. The tabloid voice of the town is already betting on who will be the first to walk out during her opening set. Will it be the Wicked ladies, Cynthia Erivo and Ariana Grande, or will a seasoned veteran finally snap? The aggressive tone of Glaser’s comedy is exactly what the ratings need, but it is a reputational nightmare for the stars involved.
Nikki Glaser is the only reason I am watching. If she doesnt make Leonardo DiCaprio uncomfortable about his dating life within the first five minutes, she has failed us. Burn it all down, Nikki!
The Diddy files: Why the most scandalous jokes were cut
In a shocker revelation on The Howard Stern Show, Glaser pulled back the curtain on her “Stern file” of rejected gags, and it is gory. She admitted she originally planned to drop a nuclear bomb of a joke regarding Sean Diddy Combs and his high-profile legal trouble. One deleted line featured her telling the star-studded audience, “This is the last time all of you will be in the same room together until the Diddy trial.”
The shady reality of why the joke was axed involves a fear of the room turning on her. Glaser explained that accusing an entire room of being “involved” in the Diddy scandal is a dangerous game that could end a career. Instead, she opted for a “Stanley Tucci freak-off” joke that referenced olive oil instead of baby oil. It was a calculated PR move to stay edgy without facing legal trouble or a total industry blackout.
The suspicious behavior of celebrities during the Diddy investigation has been the talk of the town, and Glaser knows where the bodies are buried. By mentioning these cut jokes to Stern, she is effectively letting the A-listers know that she could have gone there. It is a power play that keeps the room on its toes. The behind-the-scenes drama of the writing room apparently involved hours of debating just how far they could push the Diddy narrative without getting sued.
Sources say the monologue will have its own set of shady references to the fallout of the Diddy trial. Now that the mogul is behind bars, the aggressive tone of Hollywood satire has shifted. Glaser is reportedly working on material that calls out the shocker hypocrisy of the industry, and the insider leaks suggest it is her most vicious work to date. No one is safe when Nikki has the mic and a grudge.
The Julia Roberts snub: Why America’s Sweetheart is off-limits
Even a roast master has her limits. Glaser dropped a bombshell on CBS Mornings when she admitted that Julia Roberts is the one celebrity she cannot touch. Apparently, Glaser tried out some Roberts-themed material at local LA clubs and the audience brutally booed her. “You cannot make fun of America’s Sweetheart,” Glaser lamented to Gayle King. It seems the paparazzi-ready image of Roberts is still an impenetrable fortress in .
The shocker reality is that Glaser is still trying to fine-tune a “delicate” joke about Roberts, refusing to give up on the challenge. But the suspicious behavior of the crowd suggests that some stars are simply too big to fail. Glaser noted that while she can easily “take down” the newer batch of actors who are younger than her, the legends she grew up admiring require a different, more cautious approach. Is she losing her edge, or just playing the long game with the industry’s power players?
Insiders whisper that the behind-the-scenes pressure to keep certain legends happy is immense. The Golden Globes depend on these icons showing up, and a vicious roast could lead to a red carpet boycott. Glaser is walking a tightrope between giving the people at home the shocker comedy they want and keeping the shady executives in the room from pulling the plug. The aggressive pursuit of “the newer batch” like Chalamet and Grande is a safer bet for her second outing.
But dont count out a Roberts mention just yet. Glaser is known for her persistence. She told Jimmy Kimmel that she suffers from imposter syndrome and constantly feels the need to do better than the year before. If she can find a way to crack the Roberts code without getting chased out of the Beverly Hilton, it will be the scandal of the evening. The tabloid heat is already rising as fans wonder who will be the “Julia” of .
Julia Roberts being off-limits is so boring. The whole point of the Globes is that everyone gets roasted! Nikki better not go soft on us just because she wants to be invited to the afterparties.
Permission granted: The Selena Gomez and Benny Blanco scandal
Last year, Glaser took a shady swipe at Selena Gomez and her now-husband Benny Blanco, joking that a genie must have granted him a wish to land her. While the joke seemed aggressive at the time, Glaser later confessed on Armchair Expert that she actually got Blanco’s permission beforehand. This shocker admission reveals that even the most “savage” awards show moments are often carefully curated PR stunts.
However, Glaser is changing her strategy for . She told CBS Mornings that she will not be asking for permission this time around. “I would rather ask for certain forgiveness later at the afterparty when they are drunk,” she argued. This shady shift suggests that the “gentle” tone of is dead and buried. Glaser is boldly rejecting the standard of care that usually protects A-listers from being humiliated on national television.
The behind-the-scenes drama regarding this “no permission” rule has reportedly left several publicists in a total panic. Without a heads-up, the stars are left vulnerable to unplanned shockers that could ruin their “perfect” night. Glaser is leaning into the aggressive nature of her craft, telling Jimmy Kimmel that she views herself as competing against her own past performance. “And she is a bitch,” Glaser quipped about her self.
Expect the paparazzi-style cameras to be glued to the faces of the nominees during the monologue. Without the safety net of a pre-approved joke, the suspicious behavior and awkward reactions from the crowd will be the real story of the night. Glaser is betting on the fact that Hollywood ego is the best fuel for comedy, and she is ready to snort a line of fame and let the jokes fly.
Family secrets: Testing roasts on the St. Louis “Commoners”
Where does a world-class comedian go to test her most scandalous material? St. Louis. Glaser confirmed to Kimmel that she used her family as a sounding board over the holidays. She ran her aggressive roasts by her parents and sister to see what “normal” people thought. This insider peek into her process shows a woman who is obsessed with hitting the right note for the “people at home” while still annoying the shady elite in the room.
The behind-the-scenes chaos of a family holiday where the main activity is “roasting Leonardo DiCaprio” sounds like a tabloid dream. Glaser is trying to bridge the gap between the poverty of spirit in Hollywood and the reality of her Midwest roots. She wants jokes that the people in the room “get” but that also play for the millions watching on TV. It is a vicious cycle of writing and rewriting that Glaser takes “very seriously.”
Her family reportedly gave her the brutal truth about which jokes were “too mean” and which were “not mean enough.” The shocker reality is that Glaser’s parents might have more influence over the Golden Globes than the producers do. This unorthodox approach to hosting is what makes Glaser a threat to the system. She isnt interested in the “standard of care” for A-listers; she is interested in what makes her dad laugh in St. Louis.
I love that she tests these jokes on her parents. It makes her seem so normal while she is literally about to destroy everyones reputation in a week. I hope her family told her to go HARD on the Diddy stuff!
The cliffhanger: Who will be the “Victim” of the night?
As the countdown to January begins, the speculation is reaching a fever pitch. Nikki Glaser has the scripts, she has the aggressive tone, and she has a room full of shady celebrities waiting to be exposed. But the biggest question remains: who will be the “Ben Affleck” of ? Who is the one star that Glaser will ruthlessly target until they want to crawl under their table? The insider whispers are pointing toward a major shocker involving a certain “Marty Supreme” star and his suspiciously young dating history.
Will Chalamet be able to laugh at himself, or will the tabloid heat be too much for the new king of Hollywood? And what about Dax Shepard? Glaser already teased a joke about his podcast obsession that was cut from the Stern interview. Will she boldly bring it back to the main stage? The legal and professional pressure on the Golden Globes has never been higher, and Glaser is the loose cannon that could either save the show or burn the whole institution to the ground.
The shady reality of awards shows is that the host is always the villain to the people in the room and a hero to the people at home. Nikki Glaser is ready to play both roles. Stay tuned, because the next leak from the rehearsal room could be the one that ends a career. The scandal is heating up, and the paparazzi are watching the stage door. Who is going to get roasted, and who is going to get iced out? The truth is coming, and it is going to be brutal.
Would you like me to look into the secret seating chart for the Globes to see which stars were moved away from the “roast zone” near the stage?
